#15. Bowling for Penguins

Judge: - Hagbutt

Contestants:
Sammius
Alexi Derenkovus
Alikclyes
Duckimemnon
Hieronymous Boschus
Hagbuttus Malicius
fiendius maximus
Andycles Langicus
Spookulus

First of all Judge Hagbuttus took it upon himself to eliminate any competitors who had failed to notify him of their abscence. As suck, Sammius, Duckimemnon, Andycles Langicus,& spookulus were instantly disqualified with an automatic yellow card for future events.

Leaving just: Alexis Derenkovicus
Hieronymus Boschus (who couldn't make it and entered his
second, Pengus Slidus)
Fiendius Maximus
& Alikclyes

First up was A. Derenkovicus, who was wearing the Official Team Malkav Bowling shirt w/ red wagon in tow. He seemed entirely unperturbed by the raucous sounds of drunken penguins shouting insults at the contestants. Luckily we have Empoeror penguins as bouncers at all Penguin Bowling events, which is very useful.

After a few warm up throws at the eliminated contestants, he throws a big red ball down the lane towards the sedated penguins, but strangely, it explodes half way down the lane in a shower of hjerring. He then proceeds to try with his blue ball, which unfortunately became controlled by a Tremere. Oh woe. And then uses a clear plastic ball which completely fails to knock any down due to the fact that the penguins were stuck fast to the ground by an unnamed competitor.

Hagbutt surveyed the bored audience, the evil contestants who left nothing for him and sent this A. Derenkovicus to join their ranks, due to him being quite dull and having very few real gimmicks. Yawn.

Second up was Alikcyles, who had a very organic looking bowling ball. For some strange reason, this ball made the audience nervous as it growled angrily. And then, he bowled.

The sedated penguins immediately broke out of their spell and ran like buggering, leaving Hagbuttus to declare this bowl a strike. Alikclyes continued to do this for some time, until Hagbuttus got bored and sent him off for repetitiveness.

"Yawn, I expect entertainment, not terror." said the Judge with glazed over eyes.

Third up was fiendius maximus who took his place once more. He actually made his bowling bowl on site, to show that he wasn't cheating. How dull. However, unbeknown to Hagbuttus Malicius, the audience were very intersted in this ball and as one, they charged Fiendius, but as he had tied their shoelaces together before coming on, all 110 penguins in the audience fell over. Thus fiendius declared that he had won off of one strike.

Hagbuttus was most impressed by this show of forethought and sadism, and immediately granted Fiendius Maximus the Gold Medal

Boschus's second came up in fourth, smug in the knowledge that he would get a silver medal for his unholy master. He did so by simply sliding along the runway to the bottles. Very simple, and stylish, so Hagbuttus gave him a 9.0 average.

As all other contestants were disqualified, Hagbuttus awarded gold to fiendius, silver to Boschus's second Pengus, and kept the bronze for a later date. heh.

On to the next event:Pie Throwing!

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